Time and time again, I find myself arguing with my six year old daughter. Be it about her having to wake up for school or wait a bit extra for dinner to be ready. She is a very strong-willed, yet sensitive child. I am a very strong-willed, impatient momma.
I get easily frustrated with her, forgetting she isn’t intentionally trying to rile me up. Sometimes she really is just genuinely tired or hungry, and most days I can see that, yet still can’t help lash out when she throws a tantrum. She’s a very smart girl and a great helper.
I finally realized that my tantrum vs her tantrum just wasn’t working. It isn’t ever going to work. You can’t fight fire with fire. So, instead of trying to “fix” her, I read around and found some tips that will help me be a more calm and patient momma. Little by little, so here’s 5 quick tips for you to try out, if you’re like me when it comes to handling temper tantrums.
- Take a step back. When you feel yourself getting angry, walk away or turn around and take a few deep breaths. We tend to act so quickly in the moment and if we just take some time to breathe, chances are our mood will change; making us able to better handle the situation.
- Listen and try to understand how your child is feeling. Sometimes we think we know it all, but if we just let them speak and explain, we may be surprised to know that they didn’t mean harm or spite. Sometimes it was truly an accident or curiosity.
- Stop yelling. (I’m guilty of this one, far too much!) Yelling doesn’t help the situation. Our kids are only hearing our voice, not the lesson we are trying to get across. If we just lower our voice a little and talk to them at an eye-level, they may respond better. Give it a try. Then, from there, try going a whole day and then a week without raising your voice.
- Don’t be afraid to ask for advice…from other parents, the internet, or even those parenting books you hear about! Learning coping tips that work for you and practicing them is the only way to get better. Becoming a patient parent, takes patience. It won’t happen overnight, but it will be worth it.
- Take time for yourself. Take time away, even if it’s just 30 minutes during nap time, to give yourself a quick mani or take a hot bath. If possible, get your hubby or someone to watch the kids and treat yourself to a spa day once or twice a month. This will reset your momma-clock, relax you and having you feeling ready to take on the tough days again.
It’s not easy being a patient parent and you’ll never be a “perfect” parent. No one is, not even me…or any other blogger mom that you think is. It’ll take a few tries, but if we just slowly incorporate one tip at a time, we’ll get there. Our children deserve calm parents. Let’s practice being patient and help them learn to become patient, too. We can only lead by example.
As always, thanks for reading! I hope I helped a struggling momma out today! We’re all in this together.
P.s…for more of my (non-expert) tips, subscribe below! 🤗